Uni is finally leaving it’s mark on me. I don’t look like a sixteen year old anymore, at least not in this photograph. Here, last November, I had just finished the first essays that counted towards my degree and was extremely tired as I headed out to a college ball.
There is something odd about it, watching myself age a little bit, but still not actually look like a twenty-something. Or at least, look younger than my little sister.
When it all comes down to it, the second year of uni is so much harder than the first. With every piece of work actually counting, even if it is just a few percent, towards my degree there is a sense of tension with each essay submission.
On Thursday I have to deliver a presentation, which is summative (meaning it counts). It’s going to be on Rodney Hilton and the Communist Party Historians’ Group. A few weeks ago I was incredibly stressed but funnily enough now the stress is starting to wear away.
I think that might be due to the close to one full working week (student style anyway) that I spent trawling through the archives of the Communist Party, and all of the time reading articles and books aside.
It’s made me remember: that only when you give something your all can you ever be confident in it. And yes, this is far too much of a degree centric post for my taste, but it serves it’s purpose.
I’m writing this at Creative Writing Soc before we head over to the student’s union, writing a scene of my novel at the same time, and I know what I will do if I want my dream to come true. I will write and write some more, until I have no more words left inside me.
Sometimes at uni it is easy to get distracted by all of the work and not what it means, so I can need a reminder. All of this essay research will help me if I ever want to write something historical (especially like my planned next project!) and I now feel very ready to write copy if I need to do that.
Back to the novel scene, Disney soundtrack on in the background, and then off to the pub.