I’ve already made some changes to the bit in green, which is the second draft version of the above bit. But here’s the thing. These tiny changes represent a BIG change in the dynamic of the story, that’s caused lots of little changes like this one. And here’s another thing.
Reading writer’s blogs lately I’ve realised something that’s really important. A novel needs to be high concept or have some kind of hook. My last book, unrevised as it was, had that. This one as I’m reworking it feels a little middle of the road. And I’ve just realised exactly why.
Here’s the thing. I forgot about how essential the JOURNEY of the protagonist is. She has an inner journey in draft one, but the outer journey is rather minimal. The world she is in is exactly the same at the start and end. Hopeless.
So we need something else. Some more TENSION. Because otherwise this novel hasn’t got anything to keep us interested right through until the end.
This has shown me that I need to streamline the opening and cut right to the chase, because there are whole sections between what I have so far and the ending I reach. We need robot battles and fighting and a resistance movement, not just the scarce hinting at danger we’ve got so far. Else I fear that the novel doesn’t have enough to separate it from other ones in this genre.
I’m glad I’ve had this realisation now while I’m at the early part of the draft, where I can expand the book and make it into the seeds of something magical.